Belichick Hates Tablets


New England Patriots head coach Bill Belichick turned some heads when he Gronk-spiked his Microsoft Surface tablet on the sidelines last week.

Belichick took it further during his Tuesday press conference going on a five minute and twenty five second rant about tablets.

“As you probably noticed, I’m done with the tablets. They’re just too undependable for me. I’m going to stick with pictures, which several of our other coaches do, as well, because their just isn’t enough consistency in the performance of the tablets. I just can’t take it anymore. For me, personally, it’s a personal decision, I’m done with the tablets. I’ll use the paper pictures from here on, because I just have given it my best shot. I’ve tried to work through the process. But it just doesn’t work for me, and that’s because there’s no consistency to it.”

Microsoft issued a statement defending the iPad stepchild.

“We respect Coach Belichick’s decision, but stand behind the reliability of Surface.”

The NFL also jumped to defend their corporate brothers:

“Microsoft is an integral, strategic partner of the NFL and implementing their technology on our sidelines has increased the efficiency and speed of collaboration between coaches and players to an all-time high.”

Belichick wasn’t done, however. He later went on to rail against his iPhone 7 saying he will revert back to a flip phone. Belichick explained that he missed the satisfaction of closing the flip phone to end a call. “Pressing the red ‘End’ button just doesn’t provide the catharsis I need when hanging up on someone.”


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